April 2011
45 posts
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Queen Elizabeth Totally Looks Like Jim Carrey in... →
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“Mediocre food offends me. Aside from restaurants I’ve been to before, the only...”
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Yelp Reviewer on Bourgeois Pig, East Village, NYC
5 Useful, 6 Funny, 2 Cool (via theyelpelite)
A cursory googling of the word Biffledom reveals that not only is it a bullshit word, but most of the first page results comes back to this Yelp review in some way or another.
I’ve lost...
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Doomed Business Models
Ryan: I want to open up a specialty grocery store that has mostly specialty meats, processed foods and transfat fried potatoes.
Me: I'd shop there.
Ryan: It would probably do well.
Me: Healthy groceries are so mainstream now.
Ryan: Really though. I could think of a worse business.
Ryan: Like social branding.
Ryan: or a farm only for cow tipping.
Me: I'd farm there.
Ryan: You-build-it car company
Ryan: A water manufacturing plant.
Ryan: A liquor store that only sells mixers.
Ryan: A bunny ranch filled with 4's.
Ryan: Countertop sized swiffer sweepers.
Ryan: Wall to ceiling carpet company.
Ryan: Oxygen bars.
Ryan: Yogurt milkshakes and co.
Ryan: Childproof car seats.
Ryan: A laptop with the screen on the bottom. Keys on top.
Ryan: Mitten socks.
Ryan: Sock mittens.
Ryan: Opaque privacy glass.
Ryan: You kill it, we grill it, bacon farm.
Ryan: Really though, artisan cut meats, hard to find cereals, a whole beer/keg section. It would be a men's grocery store.
Ryan: Food n stuff.
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eskimosunkist replied to your post: I DON’T CARE I don’t know who in America will be waking up at 4am to watch it. That’s kind of pathetic. Maybe if it’s the end of the night, and you’re still awake from the greasy food you just ate, then it’s something to do.
If that number is greater than “1” then it’s one too many.
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I DON'T CARE
<rant>
SHUT UP ALL OF YOU, PLEASE.
There are a billion things happening on our planet, RIGHT NOW, literally at the instant you are reading this, and all of them are infinitely more important than this
AWFUL
STUPID
RIDICULOUS
WEDDING.
Stop it!
Go volunteer at a soup kitchen. Join Big Brother/Big Sister. If you’re in Alabama, go help a tornado victim.
Do something else...
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WatchButt.
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Maniacal Rage: Fuck You, Tiny Wings →
maniacalrage:
I hate this game. I hate it so much. Every time I open it, I tense up. I dread touching for sunrise. I hate the night. It’s a fucking bastard, the night. And what about the sun? The sun is a lazy bitch who only helps you out in the beginning and then no matter how well you fly it just sits up there, heavy in the sky, ready to fall at your first minor setback.
And speaking of...
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All Of My Important Stuff Is Broken
The Amazon AWS/EC2 outage is killing me.
All of my favorite services are borked. Most notably, springpad.
In related news, I’m a big whining baby.
Obligatory Louis C.K. link:
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BP narrowly misses out on safety award →
Not a joke.
via Reuters.
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Tweetbot: The Reason ‘Twitter for iPhone’ Is Off...
Image property of Tapbots, to whom I have no affiliation.
You may (or, may not) have noticed an influx of Tweets this morning, all either originating from or talking about a new app for the iPhone: Tweetbot from Tapbots.
The tubes have been gleefully alight with praise for the app too:
Tweetbot’s Got Personality via Shawn Blanc
Tweetbot is the best Twitter client since sliced...
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Rent The Country of Lichtenstein for $70k... →
Because why not.
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40 Ways to Simplify Your Life and Be Happy →
Congratulations on publishing a hilariously abstract and complicated list about simplification.
This is certifiable irony.
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Ten Sexy Ladies: That Broken Toilet →
tensexyladies:
Boy what a time I had in the office bathroom! Get this: I go into one of the stalls and see there is still pee in the bowl. Wait there’s more. I briefly consider moving to the next stall but that’d be a middle stall, and who wants a middle stall. Nobody is who. So I flush the toilet and it gets going on a very hearty, loud, industrial-strength flush, the kind you can only get in...
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Nicolas Cage’s Copy Of Action Comics #1 Found... →
Oh thank god. I was having the hardest time sleeping.
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“A vodka martini ought to be renamed “I like being drunk” because that is its...”
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Jen Agg, from the article “Vodka is Stupid” on Charcuterie Sundays, via The Fox is Black
I’ve been saying this to people for years. Grey Goose is a complete hack of a product, and “high end” vodka that gets imported to North America is an absolute joke. Somewhat...
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The Humble Frozenbyte Bundle Is Live →
I’ve donated to this project the previous two iterations, and I was more than happy to donate this time. Every time I always find myself donating a little more too, how strange.
The project started in the summer of 2010, and was immediately and wildly successful. The premise is that a smattering of independent developers will offer their games up for The Bundle, completely DRM free,...
“Every gun that is made, every warship launched, every rocket fired signifies, in...”
– Dwight D. Eisenhower
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Conversations About Things Hipsters Like
Me: Anyway, sundial watch. Hipster?
Ryan: Ineffective inside.
Me: Huh?
Ryan: Can't use it inside.
Me: If anything that makes it more hipster. Plus even when I wear a watch I almost never look at it. That's what my iPhone is for.
Ryan: It would also need a compas to be accurate.
Me: For true hipster cred it should be home made... who cares if its accurate?
Ryan: You would need a second form of time keeping when its cloudy.
Me: MY PHONE. FUCK.
Ryan: Yeah but if your phone died, you would need a compass handy.
Me: No I wouldn't because I HAVE NEVER NEEDED TO KNOW THE TIME THAT BADLY. Stop hating on my sundial watch.
Ryan: You're a sundial watch.
Me: GODDAMMMMIIIITTTT!!!!
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Classy In A Way That Only Republicans Can Be
Don’t know how I missed this, must have been the sickness, but the Republican controlled House just blocked some FCC net neutrality rules and told them to stop trying to get them through. This was a few days ago apparently.
Color me surprised.
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Being Sick Is Awful
The only thing getting me through this is Netflix, Luden’s Wild Cherry Throat Drops, and BIT.TRIP RUNNER (on Steam, not on my Wii… not that it matters).
I’m watching Anthony Bourdain: No Reservations from Season 1 on. I will be a jerk and hungry by the end of the weekend.
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Folks From The Mono Project: You Have My Attention
Mono for Android just hit its 1.0 release. The original Mono is an Open Source implementation of Microsoft’s Common Languate Runtime, which is what makes .NET work.
You can think of the CLR as being very similar to the Java Virtual Machine (or Dalvik on Android). Code written in any of the .NET languages gets compiled, but not in to native code. Rather, it gets compiled in to a type of...
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WatchThis year’s A.V. Undercover track list is some kind of incredible, and this cover of Wilco’s “A Shot In The Arm” performed by The Low Anthem is some kind of indicative of how it’s gonna turn out. Really really great.
via The A.V. Club
“I am a fan. I have seen them live and it was excellent. But the fact that...”
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Caroline McCarthy (via tmblg)
Priorities: Our generation really does have them all sorts of fucked up.
